Standing Here – Baring it All

Vulnerable. This is a word that used to be a rare word that sat in the background of life and grateful Brené Brown helped bring this word to the forefront. Not only do people consider being vulnerable in a personal setting, but it is also becoming commonplace in the workplace. For me, in either place, being a rather guarded person, the word alone makes me feel the feels.

When I think about being vulnerable, I have the flash of standing in front of everyone - baring it all. I remember a movie with Meg Ryan where she said she dreamed she was standing in the street naked …and her friend said I love that dream …and Meg Ryan’s character goes on to say that what happened to her in a situation was worse than that dream. In that movie scene she was vulnerable. I think I would have to agree with Meg on this one. I’d rather stand in the middle of the street baring it all than feeling vulnerable.

In the last couple weeks (really longer but let’s stick with a couple weeks), I have avoided being vulnerable. I avoided it like the plague. Avoiding difficult conversations that should take place for fear of having to say what I really felt, leaving me vulnerable. Avoiding voicing my opinion out of fear of alienating people I care about, leaving me vulnerable. Avoiding taking chances for fear of failure, leaving me vulnerable. I’d rather stand in the middle of the street baring it all than feeling vulnerable.

And then there was no avoiding it – moving to being vulnerable is what I had to do. I had to face the situation and jump. So, with a calm, yet trembling voice, I faced the difficult conversation. I voiced my opinion. I took a chance. I left myself vulnerable, baring it all. My fears didn’t materialize as I thought they may. I didn’t crumble under the pressure to say just the right things. I lived to tell the story.

I’d be lying if I said I’m not replaying the conversation in my mind as I am an over thinker, but I am proud of myself for facing a difficult situation, putting myself – putting my heart – out there, for facing a long overdue conversation. I don’t know what will happen next, but I can hold my head up knowing I have bared it all. I have opened my mind and opened my heart. I trust the Divine Plan is in action and what needs to happen will. I will be okay and, in the end, and more connected to my vulnerable side and unafraid to bare it all.

Standing here, baring it all and feeling hopeful. ~ChaCha